A Reflection of a First-Timer’s Silent Retreat Experience

I recently came from an INDIVIDUAL GUIDED SILENT RETREAT! ✨

Suki ata ako ng retreat, I realized. I counted and I’ve been in maybe 20-25 group retreats as a retreatant or as a servant in the last few years.
But an individual, guided silent retreat? I wasn’t sure what to expect.
I’ve learned to come into retreats with no real expectations other than openness to God. And when you have no expectations, you open yourself to the possibility of being surprised.
The Lord has been impressing on me my need to be ministered to. Being in ministry, we tend to give a lot of our time and ourselves to others, sometimes to the point of burnout (when we fail to set healthy boundaries). In talking and praying with people, we constantly ask the Lord, “What do You want me to say to him/her?” or “How can I be of service to others?”
But it’s important to let ourselves— in humility— take time off every now and then.

To first receive love from Him.
To cut down the noise and listen to what He wants to say to us in prayer.
To be a Mary sitting at the Lord’s feet.
To let God tend to and minister to our own weary hearts.

I think prayerful retreats are the equivalent of when Jesus, after preaching to crowds and performing miracles, would go off to lonely places to rest and gather strength for the work up ahead (I have a theory Jesus was an introvert, but that’s for another time 😛). To spend time in prayer and commune with His Father.
The individual, guided retreat format was a refreshing surprise; tailored to my specific needs and concerns. I’ve been extolling its virtues to my friends (mga suki din ng group retreats) since!
I’d have an appointed time to talk with my retreat guide and spiritual director once a day and based on what we talked about, she’d prayerfully discern what God— the ultimate Spiritual Director— might be inviting me to. Then she’d give me prayer points to consider for the next days. It made me feel so ✨special✨. As someone usually on the giving end of ministry, this time I’m the one receiving. It’s like the Lord turning His focused attention on me and saying, “Hey, I have something to give to YOU. I want to be of service to YOU.”
So you sit there and just take it in, relishing and basking in the love God so generously gives. And perhaps for us ministers… sometimes… just sometimes… you don’t *always* have to immediately share it with others.
Allow yourself to be loved by God. Let it linger.
As a friend (a religious sister) told me post-retreat: CHERISH it. SAVOR it. Wag mong i-ping-pong agad sa iba (or kay Lord). He would want us to receive.
I also came out of the retreat with a deeper appreciation for the ministry of accompaniment. How valuable it is to have someone praying, listening, and journeying with you, even in the sometimes solitary paths the Lord takes you. 🥹

Much love to the Cenacle Sisters for the wonderful retreat experience (but this is not a sponsored post lol) and to my SD (whom I met face-to-face for the first time after months of online spiritual direction) 💖 Thank you for being God’s instruments of grace to me!

 

Submitted by:
Regina Silva on August 2, 2022
She is an animator who uses her gifts to evangelize and help others make sense of their experiences through her art.
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